marriage

# 19 Jun, 2013 19:07
Khan	dhizzo Foreigner - I want to know what love is. ^ listen to this and cry. Then figure it out. ^ THIS I've hung out with some couples that you can tell within minutes that these two are only 4 ml of vodka away from beating each other with a stick. Like two wobbly tops spinning side by side getting closer and closer to knocking into each other. quote

# 07 Jul, 2013 21:18
SatanaJoy	tony696936 when do you realize it has come to it's end? when do you quit staying just for the kids? how useless must you feel before you finally let go? I'm really sorry you're having to go through this. It just sucks. The only thing I can offer is my own experience in making the decision years ago(no kids,though–just pets). I decided to leave because of a dream. I dreamt that my husband and I were standing on the roof of a skyscraper. He was dressed in a tux and I was in a wedding dress. We were just facing each other, not talking. Suddenly, two white doves appeared and grabbed the ends of a ribbon that was tied at the empire waist of my dress. The birds started to pull me back and away from my husband toward the edge of the roof. I couldn't resist them. I kept looking at the birds and then to my husband, pleading with him to help me. But he did nothing. He just stood there with a blank stare and slight grin. The birds pulled me off the building and then I woke up. Instantly I knew my subconscious was telling me I should leave the marriage. So maybe trying to remember and paying attention to what your dreams are telling you will help. I have since remarried, but my thinking on marriage has changed a lot in the past few years. I think it makes some things easier from a legal standpoint, but that's about it. If I find myself single in the future, I would not get married again. I wish you the best, and again, sorry you're having to go through this. quote

# 07 Jul, 2013 21:18

SatanaJoy

tony696936
when do you realize it has come to it's end? when do you quit staying just for the kids? how useless must you feel before you finally let go?

I'm really sorry you're having to go through this. It just sucks. The only thing I can offer is my own experience in making the decision years ago(no kids,though–just pets). I decided to leave because of a dream. I dreamt that my husband and I were standing on the roof of a skyscraper. He was dressed in a tux and I was in a wedding dress. We were just facing each other, not talking. Suddenly, two white doves appeared and grabbed the ends of a ribbon that was tied at the empire waist of my dress. The birds started to pull me back and away from my husband toward the edge of the roof. I couldn't resist them. I kept looking at the birds and then to my husband, pleading with him to help me. But he did nothing. He just stood there with a blank stare and slight grin. The birds pulled me off the building and then I woke up. Instantly I knew my subconscious was telling me I should leave the marriage.

So maybe trying to remember and paying attention to what your dreams are telling you will help.
I have since remarried, but my thinking on marriage has changed a lot in the past few years. I think it makes some things easier from a legal standpoint, but that's about it. If I find myself single in the future, I would not get married again.

I wish you the best, and again, sorry you're having to go through this.

# 09 Jul, 2013 22:43
Leo.heuser	I'm married to the love of my life, and the only reason we're still together is because I stopped dwelling on our unhappiness and started asking myself why we were unhappy. What I realized was that I was so focused on my failure to make her happy that I totally forgot to take care of my own emotional well being. So I stopped trying to get her to talk about it, stopped trying to figure it all out, and simply began to enjoy being alive. Turns out my shitty mood was just feeding the fire. Most people have a hard time being miserable around someone who is so obviously having a good day. But it had to be genuine. Not saying this is any kind of answer to your situation. Hell, I'm an idiot, so take it with the proverbial grain of salt. It's just that I know it sucks. We've got a kid too, and I was asking the same questions you are. Just thought I'd share my experience. I hope it helps, but if not, hey, what'd you expect from a stranger on the Internet? quote

# 09 Jul, 2013 22:43

Leo.heuser

I'm married to the love of my life, and the only reason we're still together is because I stopped dwelling on our unhappiness and started asking myself why we were unhappy. What I realized was that I was so focused on my failure to make her happy that I totally forgot to take care of my own emotional well being. So I stopped trying to get her to talk about it, stopped trying to figure it all out, and simply began to enjoy being alive. Turns out my shitty mood was just feeding the fire. Most people have a hard time being miserable around someone who is so obviously having a good day. But it had to be genuine.

Not saying this is any kind of answer to your situation. Hell, I'm an idiot, so take it with the proverbial grain of salt. It's just that I know it sucks. We've got a kid too, and I was asking the same questions you are. Just thought I'd share my experience. I hope it helps, but if not, hey, what'd you expect from a stranger on the Internet?